Food and Drink






I wouldn't claim to be a die-hard foodie, but I've worked in wine retail, live with a chef in Berkeley's 'Gourmet Gulch', and have written food and drink reviews for Shecky's, Citysearch, and Not For Tourists.

So, if you're thirsty, I can probably point you toward a suitable watering-hole.
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The Bay Area


Hog Island Oyster Farm
(not for tourists, 29 february 2008)


In a day and age when food is full of additives, it's a good lot to know where your grub is coming from. Here is one solution: Head north to Hog Island's oyster farm on Tomales Bay. There, the oysters are pulled right from the water, and after spending 24 hours in a quality-controlled bath, are prime for the shucking. This is a skill that you'll have to acquire quickly, as there are no waiters at the farm. (This ain't the goddamned Ferry Building, city slicker.) It's a very do-it-yourself experience, and folks get creative with the picnic area's open-flame grills to personally prepare oysters by stewing, skewering, and pan-frying. A popular method is to just cook the oysters right inside their shells, which results in a brine-steamed oyster and delicious sea broth. To reiterate: Hog Island provides the oysters, shucking equipment, scenery, and seating. Everything else, from beer to mignonette, is your responsibility. Reservations are required. link


San-Tung's original dry-fried chicken wings
(jet blue, san francisco, 1 january 2010)


SF foodies wear comfortable shoes to endure long wait times and sheath themselves in thick skins to allow the cursory grunts of gruff wait staffs to slide off their backs like tablespoons of grape seed oil. Both garments have come in handy at the Inner Sunset's San Tung, where patient, calloused foodies brave sub-prime conditions to feast on "Original Dry-Fried" chicken.

These Chinese chicken wings are less fried than seared, at a volume of BTUs high enough to melt the Transamerica Pyramid. This method of frying results in wings that are crispy and sticky, hot and sweet. One nibble and you'll wonder why Americans waste their time perfecting buffalo wings; the garlic-and-ginger lacquer renders bleu cheese dressing useless. The wings are spicy enough as is (some like it "mild"), and the roasted red peppers served atop the dish are for serious heat-seekers only. read more


cafe bakeryCafe Bakery
(not for tourists, 1 october 2007)


The menu of this generically named Cafe Bakery boasts that ther "house famous specialty" is the "B.B. Q Pork Bun." And if that isn't enough to get you in the door, let me point out the light price tag: a buck and a dime. These roasted pork buns (cha siu baau in Cantonese) are not the steamed variety favored at dim-sum restaurants, but the baked variety found--where else--in bakeries. What really puts these guys above the multitude of buns that I've gorged on is the generous meat-to-bun ratio. Many cha siu baau suffer from being too doughy, which makes the hunt for pork like the hard-fought quest for the pearl at the center of an oyster. But the cha siu baau at Cafe Bakery is loaded with the good stuff: chunks of pork, saucy but not drowning. The egg-wash that glazes the bun is stickier and sweeter than usual, which is a fine compliment to the 'cue. The great thing about Chinese bakeries is that they provide a steal for pinny-pinchers, and a feast for the prodigal. So try anything that looks delicious or downwright weird. You won't be out more than $1.10. link

Seoul on Wheels
(not for tourists, 28 november 2007)


Seoul on WheelsShuffling my feet underneath the Bay Bridge with a wad of cash in my pocket, I couldn’t help but hum drug-deal ditties: “Pusher Man,” “Grindin’,” “I’m Waitin For The Man.” I was waiting for Seoul on Wheels, a slick roach coach that makes the rounds through SoMa each weekday to deliver the goods (Korean BBQ) to hungry office folks and construction workers. Proprietor Julia Yoon, after the dot bomb and an unsatisfying turn as a paralegal, heard the call of the road, and now she’s cooking rib eye, chicken, and spicy pork in Hunter’s Point at 3:30 each morning before cruising up to her first stop (Bryant and Main) at 6:45. The “regular” rice bowl is stacked high for a cool $5.50. And the BBQ sandwich, a French roll smeared with mayo and chili paste, is pretty darned swell. Either get your kimchee fried right into the rice, or have a portion on the side for a quarter. As the maxim goes: If you can’t find the kimchee, let the kimchee find you. Seoul on Wheels—That’s innovation! A tip: Keep your eyes peeled; Julia can’t always get the same parking spots. Giants’ game days are especially difficult. link

Philz CoffeePhilz Coffee at Mission Bay
(not for tourists, 5 october 2007)


Philz Coffee--if that name doesn't send shivers through your caffeine veins then get stepping to SoMa right now. Phil Jaber has been preparing his secret blends in the original Mission location (24th and Folsom) for 33 years. This is Phil's first foray into the area and he should be a welcome newcomer to J-Train and Caltrain commuters. The new location is housed inside of the Mission Creek Senior Center, and if there's one demographic that truly deserves early-morning access to jolting coffee, it's the elderly. But really all brewheads are welcome to help themselves to the "one cup at a time" style that put Philz on the map. link


Bin 38
(not for tourists, 7 november 2007)


As Lombard St. makes its bid for domination over the Marina scene, this new bar will no doubt become a neighborhood favorite. Bin 38 is a wine bar that sheds pretension and opts for comfort over stuffiness. Sunday night beer swillers will appreciate the fact that here you can take the missus out for a respectable evening and still drink a beer without offending the grape gurus--in fact, the beers are plugged right into the menu as recommended pairings. Following the Garret Oliver (of Brooklyn Brewery) school of thought on this matter, beer is given nearly equal billing to wine.read more


Blue Bottle Coffee at Mint Plaza
(not for tourists, 3 april 2008)


Farmer’s Market weekenders rejoice at the news of a permanent Bluebottle coffee location. Now you no longer have to wait in the chilly bay breeze for 30 minutes to get your coffee; nope, now you can wait for 30 minutes indoors (just kidding, wait time has been appreciably reduced, especially considering that the Bluebottle coffee remains top tier java). While all the usual Bluebottle options, like New Orleans chicory coffee, are available, the new hit is the siphoned coffee. The siphon bar is the only one of its kind within United States borders, and has the visual mystique of an alchemist’s lab. With the price tag of the machine soaring into the fifth digit, The New York Times joked that this is the first “$20,000 Cup of Coffee.” Not to be passed up for the myriad bars in the hood, Bluebottle is appealing to the SOMA workforce on both ends of their commute: Between 3 and 7 pm, wine and charcuterie are served.

New York


Domaine Bar a Vins
(citysearch, 2006)


This bar's namesake is a now-vacant field in the French Pyrenees, where co-owner Pascal Escriout's grandfather once ran a vineyard, nicknamed "Le Domaine" by the friends who gathered there to freely imbibe. Continuing the familial tradition, the bar serves carafes of country wines from southwest France alongside other international selections.

monkeytownMonkeytown
(shecky's 2007 new york guide to bars, clubs, and lounges)


Monkeytown is an impressive manifestation of conceptual dining. It's like indulging in fusion food in a funhouse: While relaxing, even lying down on the back room's cozy futons (which are squarely arranged), diners are treated to a film, a performance, or live music; leisurely service encourages aesthetic indulgence. The creations of Chef Coleman Lee Foster (Chanterelle, Gramercy Tavern) are delicious, if sometimes too mild. Still, dishes like pulled pork and milk-chocolate curry mousse intrigue, and in a neighborhood where sushi and comfort food are the norm, making a trip to Monkeytown is a welcome departure. Reservations are suggested for the back room.



Bar(n)
(citysearch, 2007)


In Short
An offshoot of next-door srtisinal eatery Flatbush Farm, this lofty space maintains the same country aesthetic. Candles and low-wattage lightbulbs create its dirt-road setting, and, rather than putting the MP3 player on autopilot, the bartenders flip an eclectic mix of LPs. The bar has concocted its own organic menu, but pulls the treats from a common kitchen; the pair also shares an immense backyard garden, with a canopy of trees that produces solitude a stones-throw from Flatbush Avenue.

What to Drink
Their in-house Limoncello is served straight up, and in two cocktails: Ciccone room (with Prosecco) and the pear martini (with vodka and Doc's pear cider).

On the menu
The generously portioned snacks range from bowls of olives and almonds (each $4) to daily takes on the farmhouse toast ($5) and sandwich ($10).


67 Burger
(citysearch, 2007)


Eleven varieties of burger, including beef, turkey, and vegetarian, anchor the menu. The Blue Burger boasts bleu cheese and bacon--in bits rather than strips, to ensure that the flavor infuses each bite. Herbivores will be pleased: The menu features four veggie burger options like the English Garden, a rendition of the cucumber tea sandwich. Spicy curly fries carry the weight of the dry, lackluster onion rings. The most progressive menu item is the beer milkshake. Made with Bass Ale, it's malty and refreshing, a fascinating fusion that deserves the Nobel Prize in chemistry.

Battle of the Bean -- Who can best define the nationalism of the caffeinated?
(unpublished, 2006)


fritalian two ...the “America Runs on Dunkin” campaign has employed the help of Brooklyn-based music outfit They Might Be Giants, who play hip, indie stuff (like some of the titles Starbucks stocks) that is quirky, but inoffensive to a forty year-old (like some of the titles Starbucks stocks). Currently they are running an ad, popularly referred to as “Fritalian” that features another irreverent They Might Be Giants jingle. It begins with the absurd string of coffee qualifiers: “Mocho-half-caf-latte-cino-mocha-duet-avec-moi.” A befuddled cast of characters in a modern coffee shop then proclaim: “My mouth can’t form these words / Is it French, or is it Italian? / Perhaps Fritalian.” An announcer appeases them: “Lattes from Dunkin Donuts. You order in English, not Fritalian.” The commercial demonstrates an intolerance for foreign languages that is nothing short of xenophobic. While at the same time it suggests that latte is an English word....

Elsewhere


Degas absintheAbsinthe:
The green fairy that gave birth to an artistic revolution
(city smart, october 2007)


...Manet and Picasso were more interested in absinthe drinkers than absinthe itself. Compared to their peers, Manet and Picasso were teetotalers. Manet’s “The Absinthe Drinker” was rejected by the Salon jury of 1859 for depicting a character unfit for serious artistic study (and for lacking technique). Manet expanded the canvas, adding legs, an empty bottle, and a glass of absinthe; it was clear that the parameters of realism were not broad enough for the blooming genius, so he destroyed them while founding modernism. The silver absinthe spoons that Picasso included in his series of six bronze-cast “Glass[es] of Absinthe” (1914) helped usher in the era of the “readymade” (a term applied to found-art by Marcel Duchamp a year later). And between these bookends are numerous contributions to the study of street life and cafe society, panhandlers and hookers, and the copious consumption of absinthe.... read more


On the Heels of the Venetian Spritz
(unpublished, 2005)

Venetian Spritz Recently I’ve been roaming the canals of Gowanus, Brooklyn, sipping a spritz that I keep tucked into my blazer, and making believe that I’m in Venice. [...]The spritz continues to haunt and puzzle drinkers long after they have left the lurid shores of Venice. Hours are spent by amateur apothecaries, whose futile efforts never quite achieve the grandeur and mystique of the Venetian Spritz. Perhaps these addicted souls expect Venice to appear before their eyes – Brigadoon style – and once again open its chasms for the voyagers. Or perhaps the Venetian Spritz is that choleric element described in Thomas Mann’s Death in Venice – not cholera, not homosexuality, but a posse of mysterious Italian aperitivos driving souls into frenzies. Consider the following excerpt from Mann’s classic: “[He] sat by the balustrade, from time to time cooling his lips with the ruby-red mixture of [Campari] and soda that sparkled in the glass in front of him.” Indeed, edits mine, of course, but the portrait is an alluring one.


Drinking in New Orleans:
Off the Bourbon-soaked path
(unpublished, 2007)



Marvin Allen at the Carousel BarNew Orleans is famed for drive-thru daiquiri stands and those sugary barrel-sized ass-kickers: hurricanes. But the thirsty visitor is doing their self a grave disservice if their drinking is confined to Bourbon Street. True, there is a certain charm in seeing doors open to bars with ever-churning rows of candy-colored daiquiri dispensers, blaring Aerosmith at 8am, while municipal employees sweep puke into the gutter. But the real liquor lover will swing by the city during the 5th annual Tales of the Cocktail festival, this July 18th-22nd. If you can make the trip, be certain to etch out space in your agenda to prowl the city and get your hands on the following four drinks...